Hey Freak!

Hee.

Mom appalled at racy books in store for teens. Maybe someone should tell her that she should change her name, too.

That, or... yeah, suuuure you were going to find clothes for "your son." You conniving little cougar, you.

OK, I've come to realize that I should be careful about what I post. Example: a few days ago, I talked about Rick Rolling. And since then, that damned song has been stuck in my head. I guess I've kinda Rick Roll'd myself.

Gah.

But I have to admit, it's kinda funny that the New York Mets got Rick Roll'd. Ah, that's what happens when Farkers find out about your contest to choose a new 8th inning song.

Anyway...

So, there's this. You can go ahead and file that under "I don't want to hear about it, I don't want to know about it, I don't want to even consider it, and for God's sake, let's never speak of this again."

OK, I can't leave you like that. Here, this video should make you smile.

They're ferocious! They're mean! They're aggressive! They eat babies and attack people!

I mean, look at this! Daddy. See how the dog is trying to eat that guy's head?

And as if that weren't enough carnage, check this out: Junior.

It's horrible, isn't it. I don't know why we don't just take all pit bulls out and shoot them. I mean, my god, think of the children! The children!

We've probably all seen street musicians, out and about, playing for tips. Some of us have stopped to listen, occasionally. Sometimes, we leave tips. But I think that most people are just annoyed by street musicians, and probably think that the world would be a better place if these one-step-up-from-a-beggar people were cleaned off the streets.

So. What happens when one of the world's greatest violinists shows up at a subway station with a violin worth $3.5 million and starts playing for tips? Would people notice the musical genius? Would crowds gather 'round for a free concert of classics (granted, nobody knew that he was a musician who normally plays for people paying more than $100 a ticket to hear him)? Would he even make twenty bucks?

He emerged from the Metro at the L'Enfant Plaza Station and positioned himself against a wall beside a trash basket. By most measures, he was nondescript: a youngish white man in jeans, a long-sleeved T-shirt and a Washington Nationals baseball cap. From a small case, he removed a violin. Placing the open case at his feet, he shrewdly threw in a few dollars and pocket change as seed money, swiveled it to face pedestrian traffic, and began to play.

It was 7:51 a.m. on Friday, January 12, the middle of the morning rush hour. In the next 43 minutes, as the violinist performed six classical pieces, 1,097 people passed by. Almost all of them were on the way to work, which meant, for almost all of them, a government job. L'Enfant Plaza is at the nucleus of federal Washington, and these were mostly mid-level bureaucrats with those indeterminate, oddly fungible titles: policy analyst, project manager, budget officer, specialist, facilitator, consultant.

...

No one knew it, but the fiddler standing against a bare wall outside the Metro in an indoor arcade at the top of the escalators was one of the finest classical musicians in the world, playing some of the most elegant music ever written on one of the most valuable violins ever made. His performance was arranged by The Washington Post as an experiment in context, perception and priorities -- as well as an unblinking assessment of public taste: In a banal setting at an inconvenient time, would beauty transcend?

It's a very interesting article about human nature. It sure made me stop and think... "What would I do in that situation?" Would I be just another passer-by, simply ignoring the performance? Could I be moved by the performance of a street musician? I would like to think that I'd at least stop and listen (and tip), in appreciation of the talent, even if I wasn't moved. So, I guess, the big question that I asked myself was "What kind of person do I want myself to be?"

Go ahead. Read the full story. Would you have stopped and listened? What would you have done?

So, I tried to post this on Saturday, but I was having connection problems, and was in a rush out the door at the time. I had to go become a brother-in-law. Yeah, I don't talk about my family all that much, but I do have a brother, and now, he has a wife.

Of course I'm happy for him, but mostly because he'll be taking the brunt of the "So where are my grandkids?" pressure from my mom.

But anyway, back to what I was posting...

• Dude. Check out this video.



• I thought this was mildly amusing... from the local police blotter, a dude robs a gas station, and asks for 20s (twenty dollar bills) only. The clerk offered all of the money, but he just wanted the 20s. I guess he didn't want to be weighed down with small bills. (here, 4th story down)



• Also in the local section, buried in a small article right before the obits... local congressman Darrell Issa is in trouble for remarks made regarding victims (including firefighters) of 9/11.
  

  
  During a hearing this week about legislation to extend victims' benefits, Issa, a Republican, described the attacks on the World Trade Center as “a fire that had no dirty bomb in it, it had no chemical munitions in it. It simply was an aircraft, residue of two aircraft and residue of the material used to build this building.”
  
  He questioned “why the firefighters who went there and everyone in the city of New York needs to come to the federal government for the dollars versus, quite frankly, this being primarily a state consideration.”
  

  
  Nice attitude. Oh, by the way, are you still pissed that Ah-nuld took your spot as governor, once you hurried Gray Davis out? Hahahahahah.



• Oh yeah! Battlestar Galactica is finally back! Such such such a great show.
  
  Really quick, here's my theory on who's the final cylon. Well, I came up with this theory before I saw Friday's season opener, so it may seem a bit far-fetched. But hey, it's a guess, just like any other.
  
  So, I think the last cylon is... the lawyer who defended Baltar in the two-part season finale last year. He came out of nowhere, and disappeared just as quickly. And, as the defender of Baltar, I think that at least makes him a possible agent.
  
  I had another theory about the humans reaching Earth and Baltar possibly posing as Jesus, but then they shaved his beard, and he doesn't look that much like Christ anymore. It's probably for the better - can you imagine the uproar from the religious folks if that was the plotline?



• Speaking of TV... who here watches Ghost Hunters? OK, so, just a question that I'm sure you've all pondered at one point or another... just how many different TAPS shirts are there? Seriously!



• Did you watch that video up there? Then you've been Rick Rolled! Sucka!
  
  Seriously, I had no idea there was a term like this, or why there was a need for it. But I think it's funny.

Happy Monday!

This article [read] was in the paper yesterday.

The San Diego County District Attorney's Office charged (transients Damian) Maple and (Frank) Montoya last week with aggravated mayhem and torture in the attack Feb. 27 on Robert Schneider. Schneider, 26, was beaten unconscious with a skateboard, then pushed into a smoldering fire on the beach. He remains hospitalized with major burns and fractures.

Dude. That's fucked up. Beat the shit out of a guy, and then push him into a smoldering fire? What assholes. After beating the guy to unconsciousness, you'd think that there'd be no need to further injure the guy, much less push him into a fire. Thankfully, the guy is still alive, and the two transients have been caught.

Oh, there's more?

San Diegans Carl Gregory and Roseann Iovine have announced that to support Schneider's recovery they will host an Australian barbecue from 2 to 6 p.m. April 13 at Bondi Bar & Kitchen, 333 Fifth Ave., San Diego.

Whoa.

Seriously?

Honestly... I feel bad, even horrible for laughing, but... that is just funny.

It's been a few weeks since I've learned anything, so I'm counting on you folks to give me some good ones. Here are a few things I know:

• I know that Arizona State is still alive in the Men's NIT after beating Southern Illinois in the second round. Go Devils!



• I know that ladybugs eat, among other things, aphids. I know this after wondering for months why I see bags of ladybugs for sale at The Home Depot. I finally looked it up.



• I know that the Uni-ball pen (the kind that's kinda wide with a squishy grip) is endorsed by Secure Document Expert Frank W. Abagnale, Jr. Mr. Abagnale is credited with inventing and implementing the watermarking system (you know, that little "lock") you see on checks that's now an industry standard.
  
  He's probably better known as "the guy who Leonardo DiCaprio played in Catch Me If You Can."



• Speaking of people who've had movies made about them... I know that Adrian Cronauer (of "Good Morning, Vietnam" fame) was in the movie "Street Fighter" (or, at least he's credited as such). What the hell?
  
  In case you're wondering, yes, I watched "Street Fighter." Last night. Well, the UCLA/Miss. Valley St. game was boring as hell. Plus, I wanted to see just how bad the movie was. Trust me when I tell you - it was bad. But I'll admit, I did laugh pretty hard once or twice. "Quick! Change the channel!" Yeah, that was pretty funny.



• I know that I love stories like this: Dolphin rescues stranded whales. Oddly enough, the dolphin was named "Lassie."
  
  OK, I made that last part up. His name is really "Moko." Well, that's what the residents call him.



• And finally... I know it didn't happen on this exact date, but the Good Friday earthquake of 1964 (March 27) in Alaska was the largest in North American (recorded) history. It had an (adjusted) magnitude of 9.2 on the Richter Scale, and the shaking lasted for over four minutes.

So. What do you know?

"The Girl is Mine," by Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson is currently stuck in my head. I just thought I'd share.

So, a few other thoughts I'd like to share...

I got to meet Andrea a few days ago (well, maybe more that just a few days). She was visiting someone up north of LA and came down here for a day for a trip to the zoo. And of course, who can resist a trip to the zoo? (Side note: whenever I go to the zoo, I get that damned "Three's Company" theme stuck in my head. You know, from when after they had replaced Suzanne Somers with Priscilla Barnes. And why do I know these names without having to look them up?) Anyway, so Andrea is just a lovely woman. We had a lot of fun running (not literally) around the zoo, getting the crap scared out of us (well, me, anyway) on the Sky Ride, and trying to find the damned Absolutely Apes enclosure. And, of course, we saw pandas. And I'm totally jealous of Andrea's camera (I only have a point-and-shoot), but managed to get one decent shot of the baby panda. It was a fun day, but damn, my feet sure hurt afterwards. Chuck Taylors aren't really the most comfortable shoe to be walk around in for long periods of time.

What else... oh yeah, I wanted to talk about all this controversey about Eliot Spitzer, former governor of New York. You see, I've been watching the local news cover the story for days now, and I'm amazed at how much they're villifying him. OK, rightfully so, but where was all this outrage when Mark Foley was caught molesting pages? Where was the outrage when David Vitter was identified as a client of the DC Madam (he's still in office, by the way)? Speaking of still having a job, hello over there, Tappy McWidestance (aka Larry Craig). I remember seeing the news when all of those stories broke, and really, there wasn't much outrage. Well, not as much as in the Spitzer case. What the fuck? Is prostitution a crime only when applied to Democrats?

Oh, and of course I have to talk about March Madness... first off, my school, Arizona State University, got hosed by the selection committee. The Sun Devils don't belong in the dance? OK, fine. I can handle that. But the Arizona Wildcats are in? WTF? ASU had a better conference record, and head-to-head, ASU was 2-0 against the 'cats this year. And the 'cats go dancing? Psssh. Oh well. I guess I have to scour the news for NIT scores.

So, the NCAA tournament. I really didn't pick many upsets (Temple over MSU, St. Mary's over Miami, Baylor over Purdue, Arizona over WV (fuckin' cats better win or I'll be really pissed that they got "our" spot), 'nova over Clemson), but then again, I also picked Coppin State to beat Mt. St. Mary's in the play-in game. The other big upsets I have are Washington State over Notre Dame, Temple over Pitt, and Villanova over Vanderbilt in the 2nd round, and Stanford over Texas, and Xavier over Duke in the 3rd round. Not that anyone cares who I picked. Anyway, my final four picks are North Carolina, Georgetown, Memphis, and UCLA, with UCLA beating UNC in the finals.

Really, what a great time for basketball fans. We've got March Madness coming up this week. And in the NBA, the playoff race in the West is as good as a race as I've ever seen. I mean, who's the best out west? The Lakers with Kobe and Pau (and don't forget, they're still waiting for Andrew Bynum to return)? Will the Suns and Shaq finally gel, just in time for a title run? What about the Rockets, who just had their 22 game winning streak snapped? Or the Hornets, with MVP candidate Chris Paul? Are we forgetting about the high scoring Warriors, or the always tough Jazz? And what about the defending champion Spurs? Seriously, who is gonna come out of the west?

The east is a much easier call... you've got the Celtics and Pistons, and right behind them in the standings are Orlando, Cleveland, and Toronto (those are all of the teams in the east above .500). But really, we all know it's just between the Celts and Pistons. And whoever wins the east wins the title, because I think that whoever comes out of the west won't have enough left after winning the conference championship.

And, suddenly, I'm tired of talking sports. But that fucking song is still in my head. Mine, mine, mine. Yes she's mine, mine, mine.

So yeah, I took another little break. Next time I take a break, just assume that whatever temp job I had ended, and I'm concentrating on trying to get a permanent job. With benefits.

I had an interview last week, but I still haven't heard back from the company. Bastards.

So anyway... some randomness:

I was in the shower washing my legs when I noticed a hair on my foot. On the top. Like, right under where shoelaces would be if I was wearing a shoe. Now, I'm sure lots of people have hair there, but I'm a pretty hairless guy. I barely have arm hair. I don't get hair in most places that other people do. I certainly shouldn't have hair on the tops of my feet, much less just one hair on the top of my right foot.

I also have a stray hair on one of my shoulders (I've seen it before, but can't seem to locate it now). I don't even know which shoulder it's on; I just know I've seen it before. One hair, all by itself, in the middle of nowhere. Isn't it funny how that happens? I mean, what made that one hair "graduate" from just being regular bodyhair fuzz to full-blown hair? Did someone spill some Rogaine on me there or something?

Back in college, I had a friend... he had hairy arms. And one day, he's all "Check this out." He runs his finger across his arm hairs, and then exclaims "There it is!" And he pulls on this one, single, long-ass hair. Like, four inches longer than any of his other arm hairs. I guess, being a hairy guy, he didn't have strays; instead he had super-long hairs to stand out. Now, I personally have never found a super-long hair like that on me, but I think I've talked to other people that have (as you can imagine, it's not something that comes up in conversation all that often).

So, I'm curious. Where are your stray hairs?

OK people, it's time to unload all of the trivia that you know. Or, at least some of it. A smidgen.

Like you, I too sometimes find it difficult to think of something I know right off the top of my head. But there's always something, so don't give up on that whole "thinking" or "trying to remember" thing. Because eventually, it'll happen, and you'll come up with little gems like...

I know that the FedEx logo contains a negative space arrow that I can't help but look at (since I know that it's there). The "arrow" is between the E and x.

I know that blue whales are the largest creatures that inhabit the earth, and that whale sharks are the world's largest fish. And I know that Robert Wadlow is the tallest man in recorded history (he was 8'11"). And I know that he wore glasses.

I know that Eddie Van Halen played the guitar solo in Michael Jackson's "Beat it," and that it's Sting who wants his MTV in Dire Straits' "Money for Nothing."

I know that Ron Jeremy has a Masters in Special Education. No, seriously.

I know that there's a guy named Eddie Paskey who appeared on more episodes of (the original) "Star Trek" than many of the show's stars. More than either Sulu or Chekov, for certain. He always played "the background guy." You know, the random officer/security/hall passer by. He was like an extra extraordinaire. His (last) name on the show was Lesley, and he's actually pretty easy to spot if you're looking for him.

I know that the largest earthquake in North America happened on Good Friday (March 27), 1964 in AK, between Valdez and Anchorage. It was a magnitude 9.2 on the Richter Scale (adjusted), and lasted for over four minutes. Now, anybody who's been in an earthquake will tell you, it's kinda scary when you feel that first shake, because you're waiting to see if it's a "real" quake or a random shake. But in the back of your head, you're always bracing for a big one. Can you imagine shaking for over four minutes straight? Damn, that'd scare the shit out of anyone.

So, people... what do you know?

OK, so some of you know that I started a project 365 on Flickr... I wanted to try to take a picture everyday from my 39th birthday to my 40th (augh!). And I was having fun with it for a while...

And then life got in the way, and I figured that I should probably concentrate all of my efforts into that whole weird "getting a job" thing. Which I've since done.

But I'm having a hard time getting back into it. I'll definitely restart my Domo 365 sometime soon, but I don't know if I'll continue with my own pictures. I dunno; I guess I'm just not imaginative enough to come up with something even remotely interesting every single day. And I know that's not really the point (that being, to chronicle a year in your life, day by day, regardless of entertainment value), but hey, if I'm gonna put myself out there, of course I want to be entertaining.

But, I guess I'll start again. And soon. Because recently, I seem to be missing a lot of shots that I would have loved to have. See, I used to carry my camera around everywhere. I always had that puppy on me. Since I've stopped with the pictures, I don't carry my camera around as much anymore. So, I missed getting a shot of my odometer reaching 200k miles. And just last night, I missed getting shots of the lunar eclipse. I need to stop missing little things like that.

Plus, I think Domo misses the spotlight. He's such a ham.

OK, so sometimes, when I'm at work, I like to crank up the volume on my headphones and submerge myself. You know, get into the work "zone." And, sometimes, when the volume is cranked, I'll feel the extra need to chair dance a little. Nothing major, just a shimmy here, a move there, maybe a fake moonwalk thrown in there for good measure.

And sometimes, when I really like the song, I'll sometimes fake sing. You know, you mouth all the words, but with no sound coming out. Because, you know, everybody else in the office can hear. And that would be incredibly embarassing, seeing's how my singing is only slightly less dreadful than the sound of dogs howling. So yeah, I do the fake singing/lip synching when I'm really into it.

And then sometimes, like this morning... sometimes sound accidentally comes out.

Not a lot of sound, mind you... but there was at least one discernable word in there. And it was audible. And people heard it.

So, I did what anybody would do in that situation... I started cursing at myself out loud, pretending that I had some major computer problem. Yeah, that's why I made that first sound. Oh, you say that you can hear me? Oh, sorry, I didn't realize! Yeah, all that cussing and whatever else you heard - that was because I was mad. I thought I had deleted something that I didn't mean to delete. And, of course, the sound you heard had absolutely nothing to do with me accidentally making noise whilst fake singing. I mean, who fake sings anyway? Just crazy people, right?

Well, like I said. I'm not crazy. I was just talking to myself.

Just a few quick thoughts off the top of my head...

• Sometimes, when I eat a slice of cheese, or some other food that will hold the marks, I like to try to take a "perfect" bite, and then I check out my teethprints/bite mark on the food. I've never had braces, and my teeth are pretty much straight, with a few minor bends and leans here and there. I guess I just like to keep track of that.



• OK, when I was a kid, I remember that we used to get two days off of school every year during late winter for... Fur Rendezvous. It's a celebration involving the World Championships in Sled Dog Racing in Anchorage (AK), but it also includes many events for locals. Yanno, I kinda miss Fur Rondy now. Maybe I'll buy a pin or something from the website...



• Have you ever heard of anybody with a balloon fetish? No? You think I'm making it up? Well, nope. I know that there are people with balloon fetishes, because I visited the balloon fetish booth while at AEE 2008. There, I saw... women blowing up these huge ass balloons. And no, it did not turn me on.
  
  But it turns someone on... different strokes to move the world, no?



• So, I haven't really paid any attention, but... are there any good movies out right now? And I mean good... not anything with Will Ferrell. OK, so maybe he's been in one or two good movies, but come on... the guy needs to give moviemaking a rest. Someone get him a variety show where he can play characters like Ricky Bobby and [whoever this new basketball player is], but instead of a two hour movie, it's like a five or seven minute skit. That's what needs to happen.



• Is it March yet? Because dammit, I've been waiting for the new (and last) season of Battlestar Galactica to start showing. We (other fans and I) have been waiting for this for over a year now! This shit better be good.
  
  In the meantime, I almost bought the DVDs for Galactica: 1980. Who remembers that show? OK, sure, it was cheesy and campy, but it's only like, $25 for the whopping set of ten full episodes (yes, the show was that good). Hey, what can I say? Don't tell me that you don't own something that's cheesy and campy...

OK, I'm done for now.

Wait. One last thing... I'm so happy that everybody is enjoying What do you know? See, it's fun to show off what you know, and to learn new stuff too. And I'm glad that I'm not the only person who's planning ahead for it. So, if you haven't yet, try to learn something new at least by Friday. Because it's fun to play.

Happy Tuesday!

OK, so last week, I made a post asking people what do you know?. And I learned some stuff. So now, I want to know more. Hell, I want to make this a weekly thing. Yeah, I'm sure some people will get bored of it, but not me. Hey, who doesn't like to trade trivia?

So, what do I know?

I know that Alaska is by far the largest state in the US (followed by TX, CA, MT, and AZ). I know that Indianapolis is the only state capitol whose name contains the state in which it resides (Indiana). I know that, for a few years, the opening theme for the old sitcom "Three's Company" was filmed at the San Diego Zoo. And that, consequently, the theme for Three's Company always pops into my head when we goto the zoo.

Come and knock on our door... take a step that is new...

Oh. Sorry about that... anyway...

So, I know that the Komodo Dragon is the world's largest lizard. I know that the platypus is the world's only poisonous mammal. I know that polar bear skin is actually black. And I know that when pandas are born in zoos, it's customary not to name them until they're 100 days old.

So, people... what do you know?

OK, I'm sure this has been done a billion times before, but it'll be the first time for me.

I want to hear every euphemism for a vagina that there is. So, whatever you've heard, no matter how obscure (in fact, the more obscure, the better!), please share.

I mean, of course, there's pussy. Cunt. Box (I never liked the term box for a vagina. I mean, who wants to put their dick in a box? Oh, wait...). Bearded clam. Vertical smile. Poon/poontang. Trim. Hatchet wound (well, it does bleed every month). Come on, let's hear them all!

And, if you're offended at all by this, I apologize. Please, take this time to call me whatever penis euphemism you'd like to. We'll be "even."

"Yeah, I'm craving burgers. Fur-burgers."

The Doogie line works every time.